The Butter Stick


Sex & Porn Industry Outsourced

Porn Industry OutsourcedThe United States economy of the 21st century has hit a new low with the current economic recession. Surprisingly, the latest industry to suffer is the porn and sex industry, which is outsourced daily by cheaper “sex slaves” in Asia and Latin America and by the changing preferences of the American consumer.

More and more Americans, especially middle aged, white, blue-collar workers look to the cheapest form of sexual pleasure. This, often enough, is made and produced by unregulated Asian and Latin American markets. Furthermore, foreign fetishes invariably develop. Online studies that track repeating and unique hits (or the number of new visitors to a web page) state that the top ten most visited American domain names of the online porn industry have exponentially decayed an enormous 56% in unique hits and 22% in total revenue since 2006. The Playboy Magazine alone has lost more than 29,000 subscriptions since its July 2007 issue while the Asian Sex Gazette and Asian Beauties Magazine both gained a total of 15,700 print subscriptions and an exponential amount of web traffic.

Sex.com owner, Gary Kremen, who is also the famous owner of Match.com has recorded a growing number of visitors clicking links leading to Latin American or Asian sex sites. He is also quoted stating that “more and more hookups occur between Asian American women and Caucasian males rather than the former white man, white woman status quo relationships” when asked about the Match.com situation.

In a recorded phone conversation, former Playboy owner, Hugh Hefner stated he likes “Asian [expletive] and [expletive] but white women just have more [expletive] and can [expletive] very well.”

“This is ridiculous to say the least,” furiously stated Tom Imus, unemployed producer and co-director of the now out of business Grab Anklez Co., an xxx-rated adult video company. “My last movie, the one we invested everything in, didn’t even get nominated for the AVN Awards (Adult Video News Awards – the Oscars of porn).”

Many in the adult industries believe this to be an unfair cause of the American economy straining and marginalizing their products from the market. The “right wingers,” “Catholics,” and “conservatives” are often blamed for trying to cover up indecency, but when one takes into account the filth and immoral (mixed sex and mixed race) porn produced that degrades Christian America, who is the real criminal? The industry categorically believes “low paid sex slaves” of Asia and Latin America are true victims and that President Bush should be subsidizing the industry as well as putting tariffs on adult imports or products featuring anything but the norm.

Don Bareilly, senior economist at the Oregon Center for Economic Studies, states otherwise: “The [porn] industry faltering is not the fault of an economic recession, but happens to be one of the causes for it.” Bareilly concluded that the “unregulated affairs and actions” of the industry allow for marketers to target audiences and consumers with varying tastes. For example, the prostitutes of Latin America cost less than an American prostitute because wages differ on supply and demand as well as the GDP of a nation.

How long must America put up with the porn industry taking to the streets in protest? With how much indecency will our Christian society degrade for some petty immoral sins? Why is the porn industry not banned yet in this, the 21st century?



Mitt Romney: “Running Was a Waste of Money”

Recent Republican Presidential dropout candidate Mitt Romney announced Friday that running for a seat in the oval office has officially been a “complete waste of money” for him and his corporate sponsors.

Romney announced his withdrawal from the Presidential race Thursday, February 7th, two days following Super Tuesday. Having lost a majority of the states to veteran John McCain and neoconservative evangelical Mike Huckabee, the $198 million spent campaigning in upwards to 35 states went down the drain faster than $20 trillion dollars of the Federal budget in recession.

“Super Tuesday was the day of reckoning,” states Caleb Hafford, a senior political analyst at Arcadia Institute of Political Science. “Romney just didn’t give enough conservative Americans the show they wanted to see and in turn had poor showing. Even his home field, Massachusetts, was almost lost to his Republican rivals. Sadly, conservatives are left with one possible candidate: the ever-so-liberal McCain. Huckabee and Ron Paul cannot mathematically gain enough electoral votes to nominated.”

“What I don’t understand,” complained Romney in front of a BS political correspondent, “is how a filthy-rich, white, Christian, pro-war, American man with good looks and correct morality can lose the favor of the public.”

The also-former-governor of Massachusetts also claimed he had not only tripled any candidate’s campaign spending amount with his own personal loot but also the sponsored money pooled in from oil and electrical companies. News Corporation, owner of Fox News, also find itself in a slump along with the conservative public now that their candidate has been taken off of the table.

“Running was a waste of money if you ask me,” further stated Romney standing alongside his supportive wife. “I am Reagan. If you don’t like me, you don’t like Reagan.”

Hafford assumes a large blow to Romney’s campaign was dealt by his liberal past, which many neoconservatives have used against him to label the man a flip-flopper. Another reason may have been Huckabee’s own evangelical Christian presence who seems to have been picked by the “Almighty” to lead.

“The real reason is evident,” states Hafford. “Is it a coincidence that a total of four adult Romney supporters have committed suicide after the televised debate in which he revealed he was a Mormon?”

One thing is set straight by Romney: “I’m never doing this shit ever again.”



Interview with Dropout Presidential Candidate Giuliani

The Butter Stick, like many other political news establishments, has requested an interview with former mayor of New York City, President of 9/11, and US Presidential candidate dropout Rudolph Giuliani for three months. Following his resignation from the race to the White House, Giuliani gladly accepted a short interview with the Butter Stick’s own Editor-in-Chief, Walter Craig.

Rudy Giuliani

Craig: Well, Mr. Giuliani, let me first start by thanking you for this opportunity. As a neo-conservative news blog, the Butter Stick is honored to interview the great reactionary leaders of our time.

Giuliani: I thank you as well, Walter Craig. It’s great to be here right now in hope of reaching all of your . . . what? 2000 readers?

Craig: More or less. I must admit however, you caught us totally off guard when you phoned us this morning. We were prepared with questions about your political stance and campaign a few weeks ago, but they may now seem irrelevant.

Giuliani: Hit me with whatever you got, my friend.

Craig: So, you’re endorsing McCain now?

Giuliani: Sure, John and I have been pals in and out of office for years. Not only do we share political viewpoints, but also have similar plans for the War on Terror. The American people must understand how important it is to have an able leader who can protect and serve the people. McCain is an American veteran and a relentless patriot. I trust this man to lead our people to victory in Iraq and at home.

Craig: McCain would get the job done it seems. To what extent, do you think, should our involvement in Iraq reach?

Giuliani: Truth be told, we’re not exactly sure. Obviously, not enough is being done as of right now.

Craig: Interesting. Any other plans now that you’re not campaigning?

Giuliani: I’ll be honest, it’s a load off my back and relief on my wallet. I’m dreaming of going back to playing some stickball in the old city. Before that however, I’ll visit Arizona for the big Superbowl. McCain said he got us good tickets by the Patriots 20-yard line.

Craig: In the past, you’ve been known to flip-flop from supporting the New York Yankees to the Boston Red Sox. Which team are you betting on in the Superbowl?

Giuliani: Every self-respecting New Yorker supports the New York Giants. It’s a fact. I’m betting on the Patriots though.

Craig: Like a true patriot.

Giuliani: That’s right.

Craig: Well, I don’t really have any more questions prepared, so tell us a little about yourself. Something the readers might not know.

Giuliani: Let’s see now . . . My color is red because I’m a Republican. Have I ever told you about how I was all by myself in a blue state during my term as Mayor?

Craig: No, but I’ve heard it all in your past debates. What’s your stance on democracy?

Giuliani: I support.

Craig: Global warming?

Giuliani: I’m for a warmer Earth.

Craig: Mayor Bloomberg?

Giuliani: Wimp.

Craig: Why is that?

Giuliani: His name sounds like a flower.

Craig: Agreed. I thank you, Mr. Rudy Giuliani for this interview with the Butter Stick. We wish you well in your future political life if you still seek it.

Giuliani: Thank you.