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First off, I’d like to say happy belated Christmas and New Year on behalf of all the staff of the Butter Stick. I, Walter Craig, have just recently arrived back from my one month holiday “vacation” in Romania, an have an obligation to pass on the knowledge gained of my cultural studies in this formerly Communist nation in eastern Europe.
The Grim Reaper
One thinks of the holidays as cheery, colorful, enjoyable festivities. Not here. Not ever. As Delta Airlines took a hard landing in the Bucharest Airport, only two colors can describe the first wintry vista of Romania’s capital: gray and filthy.
Old Communist bloc buildings – symmetrically conformed concrete flats made of the grimmest colors imaginable, and further coated in a blanket of dust and dirty snow. The entire city was broken into sectors of a giant hammer and sickle maze. In fact, every city and town, besides the poorest and most primordially feudal villages were scattered like this. It’s as if death stalks Eastern Europe.
They have a joke here in Romania. They say that when the end of the world comes, everyone should quickly move to Romania because they are literally fifteen years behind the rest of the world. This being true, I look forward to moving to country at the right time so I can merrily live out fifteen extra years in a complete piece of crap.
Traffic
If there is at least one absolute rule of the road in this crazy nation, it is simply this: be an asshole when behind the wheel of a car. It may not be that everyone is a bad driver, but quite frankly just a bunch of jerks that drive like a herd of angry bulls at the annual bull run in Spain. No laws, no seat belts; just a bunch of 2 Fast 2 Furious (bootlegged version) fans.
In times past, all traffic was categorically the same. The Dacia was the national car of Romania and the onlycar in Romania. As a matter of fact, you have to be a Romanian just to know how to drive the ancient hunk of metal whose safety standards are ranked with negative numbers. Thankfully, the Germans have made their own vehicle investments for some time now. Even though American Fords and Chevys are clearly unmatched in any car category, Audis and Volkswagons are nice as well compared to other European wheels.
It’s a Holiday in Romania
Who knew? Eastern Europe is Eastern Orthodox; some kind of Christianity no one has ever heard of before. They celebrate Jesus and Christmas, so I was fairly happy in my stay. Apparently Bucharest, the capital, had Europe’s largest Christmas tree this year. It was over 21 stories high, which means they probably took an elevator to the top to place the star, and was built by a foreign Spanish company.
When the gypsies weren’t knocking on my door hoping to kidnap me for a hearty American ransom, Christmas wasn’t half bad. Grey snow, black ice, a red Santa wearing a robe, and a piercing cold wind. Better than imagining them as a bunch of atheist commies.
Bootlegger’s Country
There are is no justice where there is no law. Romanians don’t buytheir music, movies, and games. No, everything is either downloaded off the internet freely or distributed among groups illegally. Best of all, there is no one to stop them. At one point I thought, “I wish America was more like this,” but then remembered – “oh yeah, they’re a bunch of lazy communists who like to get everything for free, but in America, we work for wages and help communism run by feeding it with consumer society.”
Travel Tip
Don’t ever go to Romania unless you’re a poor hippie.
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[...] Editorial: Cultural Studies of Romania First off, I’d like to say happy belated Christmas and New Year on behalf of all the staff of the Butter Stick. I, Walter Craig, have just recently arrived back from my one month holiday “vacation” in Romania, an have an obligation to pass on the knowledge gained of my cultural studies in this formerly Communist nation in eastern Europe. The Grim Reaper One thinks of the holidays as cheery, colorful, enjoyable festivities. Not here. Not ever. As Delta Airlines took a hard landing in the Bucharest Airport, only two colors can describe the first wintry vista of Romania’s capital: gray and filthy. Old Communist bloc buildings – symmetrically conformed concrete flats made of the grimmest colors imaginable, and further coated in a blanket of dust and dirty snow. The entire city was broken into sectors of a giant hammer and sickle maze. In fact, every city and town, besides the poorest and most primordially feudal villages were scattered like this. It’s as if death stalks Eastern Europe. They have a joke here in Romania. They say that when the end of the world comes, everyone should quickly move to Romania because they are literally fifteen years behind the rest of the world. This being true, I […] [...]
Pingback by Editorial: Cultural Studies of Romania January 23, 2008 @ 7:46 pm[...] CrankyCronos.com wrote an interesting post today onHere’s a quick excerpt [...]
Pingback by Editorial: Cultural Studies of Romania January 23, 2008 @ 7:58 pm[...] brianbutko wrote an interesting post today onHere’s a quick excerptFirst off, I’d like to say happy belated Christmas and New Year on behalf of all the staff of the Butter Stick. I, Walter Craig, have just recently arrived back from my one month holiday “vacation” in Romania, an have an obligation to pass on the knowledge gained of my cultural studies in this formerly Communist nation in eastern Europe. The Grim Reaper One thinks of the holidays as cheery, colorful, enjoyable festivities. Not here. Not ever. As Delta Airlines took a hard landing in the Bucharest Airport, only two colors can describe the first wintry vista of Romania’s capital: gray and filthy. Old Communist bloc buildings – symmetrically conformed concrete flats made of the grimmest colors imaginable, and further coated in a blanket of dust and dirty snow. The entire city was broken into sectors of a giant hammer and sickle maze. In fact, every city and town, besides the poorest and most primordially feudal […] [...]
Pingback by Editorial: Cultural Studies of Romania January 23, 2008 @ 8:31 pmI have been visiting Romania for the past three years. Each of my stays have been very enjoyable. But I have to admit that my situation is probably very different. When I go to Romania I have a beautiful companion guide friend lover who takes care of me. That is the way to see Romania. There are many beautiful places to see.
You are not wrong in what you observed and wrote. The drivers are unbelievable, the many large apartment buildings are drab and often dirty looking.
The idea of free downloads rather appeals to me after feeding Bill Gates for many many years.
I admit that I wouldn’t go to Romania if I didn’t have my friend there to visit.
Comment by Chuck Burns January 27, 2008 @ 12:33 am[...] bookmarks tagged romania Editorial: Cultural Studies of Romania saved by 3 others TUGS10197 bookmarked on 01/29/08 | [...]
Pingback by Pages tagged "romania" January 29, 2008 @ 6:35 amha.. you capitalist propagandist
come on man.. there are some great places in Romania.. I mean sure.. it’s a pretty low end country, but there are some nice places of natural beauty and stuff.. just to be fair.
well.. ok.. go to Romania for a trip, with at least one companion friend.. and expect and interesting trip.. maybe not the most relaxing thing, but it might be adventurous.
Comment by Tudor April 1, 2008 @ 12:17 pmYou didn’t like Romania because you didn’t get laid. Stop talking about other countries…. look at your own first, with fat people all over the place, fast food place after fast food place, everyone sitting at home playing computer games like they have no life. At least in Romania people have a life and Bucharest is one of the worst cities that I’ve been to in Romania and I think that it is the ugliest and dirtiest city in Romania. Go to other cities in Transilvania or to the beach, or to Delta Danube and then talk about Romania like that. Also, Greeks are also Orthodox (it’s not just Eastern Europeans) and Orthodox is very similar to Catholic (they’re both Christian religions) and so don’t judge other people’s religions, because that’s extremely stupid!!!! just because you are part of a religion that most people follow doesn’t make you a better person and it doesn’t mean that you follow the “right” religion. I suggest you do some research before you right about other countries this way. “Cultural studies of Romania”!!!!! since when??? you’ve only been to one city…. change the title
Comment by Vlad April 4, 2008 @ 12:36 pmhi
Comment by Dane Jimenez January 9, 2009 @ 9:01 amrl7ys0jjcfe6z8js
good luck
you my friend ARE AN IDIOT !!!!!!!!!!!
Comment by mike November 25, 2009 @ 12:51 pmVlad is SOO right. People need to se the soo many good things Romania Offered to the WORLD and Has to offer yet. You are an ignorant prick!
Comment by Michelle September 10, 2010 @ 11:20 pm